Now Hiring

So I just left the grocery store and on my way out I noticed a Now Hiring sign, although it actually said, "What's in your future?" To which I immediately replied in my head, "Um, not working at the grocery store, that's for sure!" Then on my way home in the car I got to thinking, just what exactly would it take to get me to work, or at least consider working at the grocery store. Here's what I came up with:

1. If Ewan McGregor were working there doing a little actor research, then yes, I would apply for the job, but ONLY if I could work where he was working in the store. Or at least near him.

2. If I got paid some unGODLY amount of money, like, oh, let's say $100,000 a year with 4 weeks of paid vacation. And that would be for working part time, of course. Then I would probably apply. But I wouldn't be no cashier girl. Forget that.

3. And, well, that's it. So...I guess I won't ever be applying for that job. Which...is coo with me. (That's gansta' talk for cool, in case you didn't know.)