And in conclusion...

When I got married, one of my favorite wedding presents I received was a bottle of champagne that my close friends had brought back to me from Paris. Cory and I thought it was such a cool gift, that we decided to save it and open it on our 1st wedding anniversary. Well, by the time that day had arrived, we had had too much to eat and drink at dinner and since it was such a special bottle of champagne, we decided to wait until our 2nd anniversary.

Fast forward to a year later, and we were out of town for our special day so we decided FOR SURE to drink it on our 3rd year anniversary. But before that day came we had moved to Chicago and Cory said, "Hey, we NEVER end up drinking this on our anniversary, so why don't we open it when you get into your first show here." Which sounded fabulous to me, since I figured I would get into a show in no time.

Well, no time became long time and every day I would see the bottle in my fridge, taunting me and reminding me that I hadn't gotten cast into a show yet. I kept thinking, any day now! But any day now became months which became a year which became...You get the idea.

Well, folks...It's been almost 2 years (literally 3 days shy) to the day that we moved to Chicago and tonight I finally....FINALLY... got to open that damn bottle.

And it was the most delicious glass of champagne that has ever graced my lips.

Let us talk it over long
and wear cream gold buttons
and be proud we have anger and pride together,
remembering high loveliness hovers in time
and is made of passing moments.

I have kept high moments.
They go round and round in me.



-Carl Sandburg

A passage from The Hours

What lives undimmed in Clarissa's mind is a kiss at dusk on a patch of dead grass, and a walk around a pond as mosquitoes droned in the darkening air. There is still that singular perfection, and it's perfect in part because it seemed, at the time, so clearly to promise more. Now she knows. That was the moment, right then. There has been no other.

I got a callback!
I got a callback!

The perils of being an actor

I had an audition today for a play and...auditions are bad enough because, I, like most actors, hate/loathe/abhor having to perform a monologue. (But that's a soapbox of its very own.) But to make the experience even worse, when I arrived at the theater, the little lobby area was DEAD quiet, which was a bit odd because usually there's the hub bub of filling out forms and actors kind of walking around mumbling their material to themselves, but no one was moving an inch and I could literally hear a pin drop and I soon realized why...because the "stage area" where we were to audition, was about 15 feet away from the "little lobby area" with just a curtain separating us from a live audition going on...which meant a few things- all of which were bad.

1. I could not make a peep, walk off my nerves, etc...as to not disturb the auditions.
2. I was forced to listen to everybody else's audition which was a bit weird and which or course meant...
3. Everyone would be able to hear mine.

All not cool things to add to the already stressful situation. In fact, I even got thrown a bit by it all because when I went in, I said hello and all that, but then just introduced my piece, forgetting to introduce myself. And of COURSE, they called me on it. I mean they weren't jerks about it, they just asked what my name was, EVEN THOUGH THEY WERE LOOKING RIGHT AT MY HEAD SHOT. I responded in true actress fashion and did the whole "bat my eyelashes and try to look cute" face and said my name, since I WAS auditioning for three guys.

I think it worked. Now if I can just get a call back...

Now Hiring

So I just left the grocery store and on my way out I noticed a Now Hiring sign, although it actually said, "What's in your future?" To which I immediately replied in my head, "Um, not working at the grocery store, that's for sure!" Then on my way home in the car I got to thinking, just what exactly would it take to get me to work, or at least consider working at the grocery store. Here's what I came up with:

1. If Ewan McGregor were working there doing a little actor research, then yes, I would apply for the job, but ONLY if I could work where he was working in the store. Or at least near him.

2. If I got paid some unGODLY amount of money, like, oh, let's say $100,000 a year with 4 weeks of paid vacation. And that would be for working part time, of course. Then I would probably apply. But I wouldn't be no cashier girl. Forget that.

3. And, well, that's it. So...I guess I won't ever be applying for that job. Which...is coo with me. (That's gansta' talk for cool, in case you didn't know.)

For those of you who caught American Idol last night...

I just wanted to reminisce a little about the season premier because so many of those auditions were absolutely priceless...

My top 5 favorites:

1. I shot the sheriff, but I did not shoot the deputy....I shot the sheriff, but I did not shoot the deputy.....This was just glorious to watch because it was the classic train wreck audition where the judges are so shocked at what they are seeing and hearing that they can't even respond, so the singer just KEEPS GOING, which makes the judges even MORE shocked, which makes the person sing MORE and it's just so awful to watch! Loved it!

2. Just like the Blue Moon girl. Holy cow! How many times was she going to keep starting her song over??? And then the capper with her just crying like a baby as she left the room. Just horrible! Loved it!

3. Then there was the white trash "Suntan girl" with her white trash mom. Eeeewe. They were so gross. And skanky. And her voice was just...Man, it was just fabulous to watch.

4. Okay, I can't leave out the goofball who thinks he can talk to animals. What was that??? That was the craziest audition and he was just wacked out! I can't even believe he's going to Hollywood. I'm laughing just thinking about it! It was so bizarre!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5. And my last favorite goes to ALL the folks who got slammed but thought, and I mean REALLY THOUGHT, that they legitimately were awesome singers. And how baffled they seemed that they weren't going to Hollywood. And they were TERRIBLE SINGERS, to put it mildly, and yet, they think they have a career ahead of them. Just blew my mind.

I can't wait for tonight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just an observation

I think its safe to say that most people don't watch TV with it 2 feet away from their face, right? I mean, even kids, when they are "too close to the television do you want to go blind!" they are at least 3 feet away. So who's brilliant idea was it to put in individual 8" TV screens on most of the treadmills and elliptical at the gym? Now, I was fooled at first too. I thought, Awesome! I can work out AND watch my very own TV.

Then I tried it. The TV screen was literally a foot and a half away from my face and I'm bobbing up and down on the machine so I'm starting to get motion sickness from trying to focus on the screen and it was just horrible. Horrible! Just put in a bunch of big TV's already!

And while I'm on the topic, what in the heck are people watching??? This is what I noticed yesterday: The Springer Show, The Price is Right, some cooking show where the chef was making all these chocolate desserts, and my personal favorite...the low quality live feed from the kids gym downstairs so parents can get a fuzzy look at what their kids are up to. For an hour.

Maybe it's just me, but watching Bob Barker a foot away from my face just doesn't sound motivating to me. Unless someone is playing Plinko, obviously, but that's the only exception!

At school today, one of my first grade girls was babbling on about all the games she had played at recess. I was multi-tasking big time (as all teachers do) so I was just catching bits and pieces of what she was saying... "And then we played Star Wars...I was the princess Leia, I think...both boys and girls in our club...I always get to pick the game even though the boys get mad..." Just incessant first grade talk that I had almost successfully tuned out until I heard, "So we just played Civil War instead."

Upon hearing that little gem of information, I immediately stopped everything I was doing and asked her in all seriousness, though smirking on the inside, just what exactly was the Civil War game. And here it is folks: "Well, I pretend to be Clara Barton and my best friend pretends to be Louisa May Alcott. And then the boys are all soldiers, except one of them is General Lee. And then we take care of the wounded soldiers if they get hurt."

You know, and maybe it was just me, but when I was in first grade, I played complicated historical fiction games like "chase" and "freeze tag" at recess. I'm not even sure I knew what the Civil War was at that age! Oh, and just in case you didn't know (because I didn't) both Clara and Louisa were actual Civil War nurses.

Tae Kwon Do master...AKA: me

So I just joined a gym and thought I would try out their Tae Kwon Do class they offer. Not sure of it was a Tae Kwon Do style class or the real deal, I was a bit nervous. All I knew was that I got one trial class before I would have to buy the uniform.

So I walked in as the aerobics class was clearing up and saw 2 black belts, a yellow belt and a white belt warming up. I ran up to the white belt gal and asked her if one of the black belts was the instructor. She said, oh no the instructor was just in here and had long blond hair. I continued to try and stretch when I spied a guy who was uniformless and looking as out of place as I felt. So I ran up to him and asked if he was trying out the class too. He was. And I'm just gonna say this right now, Thank God someone else was trying out the class.

A minute later, the blond instructor walked in and she looked...familiar to me. Familiar because she was the blond who had JUST taught the hour long aerobics class that had just finished! And now she's wearing, not just a black belt, but a solid black uniform and looks like she's about to kick some butt. Specifically: mine.

"Alright class, grab your jump ropes and start jumping until David calls time. Then I want 50 sit-ups and 30 pushups. Please be finished before I return." And out the door she went. My new friend and I gave each other the HOLY CRAP, what have we gotten ourselves into!!! look, then ran to get our ropes. And can I just say that 8 minutes of jumping rope doesn't sound like a long time, but, it is. Try it sometime.

Blonde dragon gets back in the room and immediatly starts yelling in what I assume is Korean, since Tae Kwon Do is a Korean martial art. And all the belties start yelling back in unison and new guy and I are just like, Alright, keepin' it cool...She then proceeds to lead us in a series of front and side kicks for the next 1/2 hour which was quite exhausting. Then she breaks us off into pairs and me and new guy start kicking at each other- one of us kicking and one of us holding pads for the person to kick into. This went on for the next 20 minutes when the new guy had had his fill. So with hands on his knees, bent over and absolutely winded, he asked the instructor if he can go grab some water real quick. Her answer is to look up at the clock and say, "Well, in 10 minutes when class is over you can have all the water you want." And then she walks away. Walks away! Ouch! It hurt to watch.

We stretched for the last 10 minutes and then class was over. And I have 2 things to say about my whole experience:

1. It made me feel like a badass to see the new guy who seemed like a really fit, young guy get totally winded and not be able to fully finish the class because...I'm a girl and not in the best shape and yet I did finish and it made me want to make everyone call me dragon master or something.

2. It was hard having a cute blond who is my age yell and act like a drill seargent. It was just...weird. I can deal with the yelling and the seargent bit, but let it be from a small Korean man with an accent, not the blond chick who just taught the aerobics class.

And for the record, I will not be returning. I know! I know! When you picture me in your head you think: Tae Kwon Do master. Sorry to let you all down, but this is just how it has to be.

Life

I got an email today from the president of my high school class. It was a mass email sent out to let us all know that one of our fellow classmates, who has two young daughters and 11 month old twins, had recently been diagnosed with a brain tumor. She successfully had 90% of it removed but then had a stroke which paralyzed her left arm. So now she can't go back to work and she has to go to physical therapy every day and she's a single mom and she doesn't even know how long she has to live.

After I read the email, I reflected back on the only memory I had of her. I had just moved back to Missouri to finish my 2nd semester of 8th grade. I was standing at my locker when out of nowhere she appeared at my side. She loomed over me with her height, her scowl, her heavyset body. I had never talked to her, and the fact the she was staring me down 2 feet away from me could only spell trouble.

"Why do you have your jacket tied around your waist, huh?"
"What?" I mumbled back.
"You hiding something? Have a little accident?"
I had, in fact, just been in the bathroom a few minutes earlier and noticed that a small dime sized circle of blood had shown up on my shorts. In a panic I raced to my locker to grab my jacket. But the whole time I had kept my hands behind my back so no one would see. And I was 99% sure no one had. I hadn't even passed by her in the hall! And I was just at a total loss as to why in the heck she would just come up and ask me such an embarrassing question. Right in front of people. What had I ever done to deserve that. I ended up telling her that I didn't know what she was talking about and rushed off to class, while she yelled after me, then take off your jacket and prove it! It was just horrible and since I had never been bullied before or picked on like that, a part of me really hated her for it. She actually never spoke to me again and I, or course, never wore a jacket around my waist. And throughout high school she moved on from being a bully to just being normal. Still. I never liked her.

And now she's possibly dying. From a brain tumor, no less and the small town she lives in (where we went to school) is having a fundraiser in her honor to help raise money to help pay for all her medical expenses and therapy. And I thought, you know, I should send something. Anything.

I just mentioned this to Cory and he asked why in the heck would I want to send her money. Because she has a freakin' brain tumor! And children to raise! That's why! And if it were me, it would mean a lot. A whole hell of a lot.

So I'm sending a check out. And tomorrow when I'm on my fieldtrip to the worst museum ever, and the kids are driving me mad, and I'm ready to throw in the towel, (or just throw towels in general) I will stop...and take a deep breath... and say to myself, It's not so bad afterall, is it, katy?

this was on the post secret website. For some reason it captured me so I thought I would post it on my site.